DAY 4: THIS SHOULD HAVE PROBABLY BEEN A JOURNAL ENTRY

It's not as if I forget that the Lord is good or that He's capable of turning the worst of situations around, I just wish to have it re-echoed by another human. A gentle touch, a set of genuine eyes looking deep into my soul, a warm hug, a pat on the back and these beautiful words flowing from their lips;"Juliana, God will do it",”Be strong and of good faith, your God has gone ahead of you", "This too shall pass". 

That seldomly happens because I tend to carry it all in silence. Trying not to bother anyone or dump my emotional mess on them, a habit I'm trying to unlearn. Human comfort is necessary, scriptural even, the Bible tells us to encourage one another (1 Thessalonians 5:11).

But I feel external encouragement can only do so much. People are just people- fallible and imperfect, they would not be able to accurately discern what you need all the time. My desire for human encouragement may even be an indicator of my faith level, that I have more trust in the tangible than in the intangible. That I rate the Word from the Lord echoed by a man weightier than the one plastered in the Bible centuries ago.

The One who has mastered life is the one who has mastered the art of encouraging themselves. The people who with or without external support are able to draw from scripture their true place in Christ.

Like David, what do you do when the men who you trusted -your support system- are the ones that want to kill you?

You have no other choice than to encourage yourself. 

1 Samuel 30:6 NIV

[6] David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters. But David found strength in the Lord his God.

A man well acquainted with grief and disappointment, David had to learn the art of finding strength in the Lord. A thing to note is that David can start a Psalm in deep anguish yet at the end, we will find this man still finding hope in the Lord.

Self encouragement in this context is not man-made positive affirmations that seek to puff up but have very little weight. It is the art of recognizing what God has said and choosing to align yourself with that. Finding hope in the Lord in the bleakest of circumstances and trusting His character instead of the situation.

Don't mind my AI image's hands okay😅

The soul is notorious for being swayed by what is happening i.e what the eyes see, what the ear hears, what the heart feels and what the mind understands. The soulish experience is the sum of our feelings. And feelings as tangible as they may be, are just a minute reflection of the actual story. 

Take a look at these examples;

The Lord had a different picture in mind when pregnant Hagar thought her life was over after Sarah kicked her out (Genesis 16)

The Lord's view of Gideon and Gideon's view of himself were direct opposites. By all indications, he felt that he was a poor helpless boy but God knew that he was a mighty man of valour (Judges 6:12)

Elisha's servant was drowning in fear when he saw the enemy surrounding the city. Elisha on the other hand, was unbothered because he could see what was happening spiritually.

2 Kings 6:17 NIV

[17] And Elisha prayed, “Open his eyes, Lord, so that he may see.” Then the Lord opened the servant’s eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.

The Psalmist spoke to himself on two occasions in Psalm 42 (vs 5 and 11).

Psalms 42:11 NIV

[11] Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God

God always knows the correct antidote to the soul's problems.

I am learning to go to God over and over again and hear Him whisper the answers to the questions I had previously asked. Trusting less of what my eyes see and more of what God says.

I choose to believe that God is Good “despite, in spite of, regardless of” whatever life throws and He has my best intentions at heart.

I choose the One who never changes to the ever-changing human nature. I can bank on Him forever, human beings…not so much. 

What do I do when my “encourager” doesn't like me anymore? 

What do I do when clouded by their own feelings, they too can't see God in the situation?

I will turn to the One who sees and knows all things. My Creator, my ever-present help in times of need. The strong tower that I run to and find safety. The One who causes me to hope again and again when disappointment weighs heavy on my heart.